Category Archives: Movies

Was Captain America really a man?

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I caught the new Captain America movie yesterday. It’s a decent enough superhero flick, and I felt like they didn’t try to pack too much of Captain America mythos into it making it more digestible than other comic book films I’ve seen. One thing struck me: As fans of the character may know, Steve Rogers starts out in the 1940s as a 98 pound weakling, and is transformed into a muscular Nazi Buster via some kind of serum. At one point in the movie, while still in his weakened form, Rogers makes a comment which seems to clearly indicate that he’s a virgin. Then, once empowered, he still never really seems to have the opportunity to officially become a man. The scientist who creates the serum comments that it strengthens everything inside the man who is injected with it. Thus, I think we can presume that Captain America would be an over-testosteronated sex hound. It seems likely he was masturbating at least four times a day if only to deplete his sperm production.

Going to the dogs — ha ha! Get it?

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Since this blog has recently steered towards entertaining dog videos, I would be remiss not to embed this music video featuring a team of super dogs. In high-definition they’re really gorgeous animals, and clearly dedicated to furthering the cause of justice.

Buried

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A couple nights ago I caught a rather interesting movie called “Buried” starring soon to be Green Lantern Ryan Reynolds. The conceit of the movie is interesting: an American truck driver in Iraq wakes up to find himself buried in a underground coffin. The entire film takes place in this coffin, with no flashbacks or external locations. From a production cost standpoint, it’s pure genius. The question is can the acting and direction and narrative arc carry the movie over the course of an hour and a half?

The premise itself is quite horrifying. I’ve experienced claustrophobia; the first time I ever had a panic attack was when I had a friend lock me in the truck of his car as a kind of test of manhood. So when Reynolds wakes up in a coffin as the movie begins, I found it quite disconcerting.

That claustrophobic fear is enough to keep film engaging. The movie is also a political metaphor — Reynolds, the average American, is trapped between military bureaucracy and simmering Iraqi anger, much the same way the American soldier is. However, once the movie gives away its political agenda, it limits the directions the story can move in, which makes it more predictable. Nonetheless, I would say it’s a film worth watching.

“Buried” did get me thinking about the topic of fear. Over the past couple years I’ve developed a much much better sense of what’s happening from a physiological perspective when we experience fear. And if I myself wondering whether that knowledge itself can be used to combat fear. For instance, if you find yourself in a fear inducing situation, can you simply explain to yourself that the trembling and racing heart and mind are merely the result of your limbic system reacting as it’s been programmed to do by eons of evolution? Can I take the sting out of fear? I have found over the past couple years, as I’ve read up on neuroscience, I do see more emotionally mute. Feelings don’t have the impact — either sweet or bitter — that they use to. Maybe I’m just getting old.

I would like to figure a way to eliminate fear entirely. My ideal existence would be that of a fearless unstoppable killing machine.

Remains of sexy 50 foot tall leech woman discovered!

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The LA Times notes…

Yvette Vickers, an early Playboy playmate whose credits as a B-movie actress included such cult films as “Attack of the 50-Foot Woman” and “Attack of the Giant Leeches,” was found dead last week at her Benedict Canyon home. Her body appears to have gone undiscovered for months, police said.

Vickers, 82, had not been seen for a long time. A neighbor discovered her body in an upstairs room of her Westwanda Drive home on April 27. Its mummified state suggests she could have been dead for close to a year, police said.

Religulous is largely ridiculous

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I finally caught “Religulous,” Bill Maher’s documentary criticizing religion, a couple nights ago. I was a big fan of Maher back in the days of “Politically Incorrect” but there’s no doubt that over the past decade he’s become something of an unrepentant asshole. As a result, an idea that could have been pretty interesting — a reasoned, critical look at the world’s religions — is dumbed down to Maher mocking various religious kooks. Occasionally he gets some good laughs — when a theme park Jesus tells Bill he has a God shaped hole in his heart that can’t be filled with women or drugs, Maher asks, “can I try?” — but overall, the project falls flat.

About 70% of the film is Maher taking aim at Christianity. Towards the end he sets his sights on Islam. A small portion of the film has him mocking Scientology. Personally, I think he should have done more with the Hubbard-ites; he’s a Hollywood man and it would’ve would have been good to take on his hometown religion.

Where the film really lost me was the ending. Maher walks along a pathway in Israel Israel while arguing that humanity must give up religion or we will destroy ourselves via nuclear destruction and global warming. Scary music plays and the shots are framed to make Bill look like the religious prophets he’s just spent an hour and a half denouncing. (I can’t imagine that the irony is lost on Maher, but it seems poorly delivered.) Frankly, the argument doesn’t make much sense. A) If we’re doomed unless humanity forsakes religion, then we’re doomed. And, B) I don’t think religion has a whole lot to do with global warming, and while the case could be made that it is one cause of warfare, it’s not the only cause.

Quick and dirty movie review

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I just caught the movie “Cyrus” on cable and, boy, what a gem. Great acting, absolutely hilarious and one of the few movies I’ve ever seen really deserving of the term “charming.” I’m amazed it didn’t get more attention.