I’ve spent the past couple weeks on this blog posting irrefutable evidence that all doctors are incompetent, evil and retarded. As a kind of coup de grace to any argument opposing my point of view on this, I offer the following story. A story of a man who, upon receiving no help from his doctors, resorted to eating parasitic worms found in the feces of a young Thai girl to cure his stomach ailments.
One day in 2004, a 29-year-old man with a terrible stomach problem stepped off a plane from the United States in Thailand. He wasn’t there for the sights, or the food, or the beaches. He had traveled thousands of miles for worms — parasitic worms whose eggs he intended to swallow by the thousands.
His doctor back home had told him his idea was crazy, that infesting himself with parasitic worms wouldn’t do anything to help his ulcerative colitis, and in fact could make him very sick. The gastroenterologist had told the man if he pursued this course of treatment, he would refuse to be his doctor anymore.
How could worms become healers? There’s some science behind it.
The patient became more and more convinced worms could help him. Behind Weinstock’s study was this observation: Inflammatory bowel diseases such as ulcerative colitis affect nearly one in 250 people in the United States, but are extremely rare in underdeveloped parts of the world, such as sub-Saharan Africa.
Some experts believe parasitic worms might be part of the reason. When underdeveloped areas become developed, parasitic worms, also called helminths, become less common, and diseases such as ulcerative colitis become more common.
In the case of this patient, the worms did cure his health issues. I repeat, WORMS helped him, when no doctor could.
It really makes you wonder about this mixed up society we live in. Doctors are respected, looked up to and even fawned over by gold hungry trollops. Meanwhile, it is the lowly worm who really toils to make the world a better place. Until we elevate the worm to the status of the much vaunted doctor, until dozens of nubile whores are eagerly offering themselves sexually to parasitic crawlers, I feel we can not view ourselves as moral or just.
Yaaay, Worms!
Debbie Harry’s oft told story about nearly getting abducted by Ted Bundy has been discounted by researchers. Seems to me those faggots should just find something better to do than fucking up some cute chick’s fun stories. Next thing you know they’ve be proving that Thora Birch never chased Wil Forbis from underneath her Hotel Room mattress. Actually Forbis is the only one who ever told that story so it probably doesn’t have to be discounted. “discounted”? How about DISCO!?! DISCO!!! DISCO!!! STAYIN’ ALIVE! STAYIN’ ALIVE!! YEAH!!! CAUSE THE MAN FROM MARS IS THROUGH WITH BARS AND NOW HE ONLY EATS GUITARS!! YEAH!!!