I was just thinking of my visitation, earlier this year, to the site of the Auschwitz death camp in Poland. It is, of course, a profound and moving experience which causes one to ruminate on the dark shadows of humanity. But I was specifically recalling the rather cute English-speaking guide who took our group around. She really was a juicy little tomato.

Of course, it’s difficult to water the blossom of love in such grim surroundings. I’ve been trying to think of some come on lines that might have perked her interest. Here’s what I’ve come up with so far…

“You know, I wouldn’t mind toiling as an emaciated slave in Birkenau if you were right there with me.”

“I just want to say meeting you has been a real gas!”

“Zyklon B? More like Zyklon Wowie!”

I’m going to keep working on this. Maybe if I have these sorts of things planned out in advance, I won’t be tongue-tied when the opportunity presents itself.