These are the news stories you live for as a blogger: Armed rooster kills Calif. man

DELANO, Calif. — A California man attending a cockfight has died after being stabbed in the leg by a bird that had a knife attached to its own limb.
…
“When deputies arrived, people started fleeing,” Sgt. Martin King told kget.com in Bakersfield. “One of the roosters jumped at the decedent, inflicting some type of injury and causing his death.”

That rooster was mad as hell wasn’t going to take it anymore.