Segregating Facebook

Anyone who uses facebook knows there’s the concept of the facebook stream where you can see all your friend’s recent posts. The main use of facebook is for people to go through their stream and see what witty, erudite comments their friends are making about life and art.

The problem of course is that most people are morons, so, to find the various witticisms, you have to plow through endless cat pictures, cliche political observations and the like. It dawned on me today that it would be handy to be able to segregate your stream into multiple views. For instance, I would say that about 10 percent of my friends actually have interesting things to say. If I just want to be informed, I would use that view. Then there’s another 60 percent who seldom have any insight but whose activity I sometimes like to see just to feel connected to the world; that could be another view. Then there’s about 30 percent who are total mental defectives*, but I like reading their comments in order to feel superior to them and mock their inabilities to run their lives. That could be another view.

I’m really surprised facebook hasn’t implemented that feature.

* On a side note, we really need a term for people who have a particular kind of psychological implosion on facebook. They start posting about how nobody cares and all people are untrustworthy and nobody replies to these posts because who wants to talk to a basket case? There really should be a term for that mental unraveling. It’s like a slow motion view of a person realizing their life is meaningless.

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