The secret is in the nipples!

For years men have been clumsily probing women’s bodies in search of their erogenous zones. It turns out we’ve been missing the obvious culprit: the brain!

“Waitaminute, Wil,” you say. “You mean to get women in the mood we should be sawing off the top of their skull and stimulating their brain directly?”

Yes… I mean, what? No! I just mean that by examining how the strip of brain dedicated to physical sensation — the sensory cortex — responds to erotic touch, we find points of interest. For instance…

Komisaruk also checked what happened when women’s nipples were stimulated, and was surprised to find that in addition to the chest area of the cortex lighting up, the genital area was also activated. “When I tell my male neuroscientist colleagues about this, they say: ‘Wow, that’s an exception to the classical homunculus,’” he says. “But when I tell the women they say: ‘Well, yeah?’” It may help explain why a lot of women claim that nipple stimulation is erotic, he adds.

On a related note, you might recall my post about a man who found his sensory cortex representation for his amputated foot connected to his representation of his penis.

3 Responses to “The secret is in the nipples!”


  1. John Saleeby

    You know what really gets a woman excited? Rubbing her nipples with cash. Rub a woman’s nipples with cash while talking about how after she lets you have sex with her you will give her the cash to spend it on whatever she wants and she will get really excited. No, actually, she won’t get excited at all but she will let you have sex with her – As long as you have made it clear that she will get the cash. Don’t worry about the goddam nipples, just give her the fuckin’ money. What are you worried about her nipples for? Who the fuck cares about doing anything to make them feel good? You’re already giving them money, what the fuck else do they want? Start fooling around with her stipid nipples, next thing you know you’re listening to her stories about her old boyfriends – Shit on that! Nipples! You goddam moron!

  2. Wil

    Wait – you shit on her nipples?

  3. John Saleeby

    No!