Toddler therapy

When you think about it, a lot of physical and emotional therapies involve lying around on the floor and looking up at the world. For example, Feldenkrais, the movement discipline I take classes in involves a lot of time lying on your back. The same could be said for a lot of yoga. Even classic psychotherapy involves lying in the couch.

I believe the argument for lying down in physical therapies is that you’re mitigating the effects of gravity. But I wonder if there’s another aspect to it: you’re effectively positioning yourself in the position you spent a lot of time in as a baby. You’re returning to the comfort of being a cared for child.

I wonder if we could design an effective emotional and physical therapy system based on actively returning to your early years. People could walk into a room, lie there, and be cared for as they pooped their pants, peed on the floor and suckled on the breasts of the instructor. Based on my anecdotal experience, I think such a class could have remarkable therapeutic results.

5 Responses to “Toddler therapy”

  1. John Saleeby

    Oh, Man! Can you believe what an ASSHOLE that Lindsey Lohan is? Her first on the job at the LA Morgue and of course that LITTLE BITCH just had to make BIG TROUBLE for EVERYBODY! Do you know what that CUNT did? You won’t BELIEVE IT! This PIECE OF SHIT got on the phone and ordered LUNCH for EVERYBODY who works at the Morgue!! Is that SICK or is that SICK? Didn’t even expect anybody to pay her back for it! Honestly, somebody STRANGLE that WHORE! The food was delivered to the Morgue and they took every little bit of it and THREW IT IN THE TRASH!!! GOOD FOR THEM!!! What will that HORRIBLE HORRIBLE Lindsey do next? Invite everybody out for DINNER!?! Nothing is too low for Lindsey Lohan, NOTHING!!!

  2. John Saleeby

    I’m drunk. I’m drunk and, GODDAMMIT, I don’t need your Civil War! It feeds the Rich while it buries the Poor! I’m DRUNK and I don’t need your GODDAM Civil War! Spent too much fuckin’ money on a fuckin’ bag of chips and a fuckin’; can of dip! I don’t need your GODDAM chip and dip!! GODDAMMIT!!

  3. John Saleeby


  4. John Saleeby

    Uh . . . Sorry.

  5. Wil

    I didn’t know you had access to absinthe, John.